Rating: **1/2
Starring: Izabela Dabrowska, Lech Dyblik and Andrzej Grabowski
For those who are not acquainted, Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight (2020) is a rather basic backwoods slasher following teens from a "technology detox" camp being hunted down by a pair of very deformed and obese murder twins with a taste for flesh. The only things that set this apart from your other forest-set bodycounters would be its weird attempt to flesh out its characters more and the fact that the reason behind the killers' madness was (*spoiler alert!*) a black goo-filled meteor.
This sequel follows up some time after the first film, with final girl Zosia being captured at some local police station, along with the "Fatties" responsible for massacring her friends and then some. She's there for further questioning as the head honcho of the station, Sergeant Waldek, couldn't wrap his head around her story of meteors turning people evil and how Zosia supposedly murdered one of the Fatties by stabbing him to death with a machete, so to get a better idea what happened, she's eventually taken back to the Fatties' humble abode and asked to point out where it all happened exactly.
Unfortunately for them all, once they get there, the meteor responsible for turning the Fatties evil strikes again, this time oozing its goo into Zosia and turning her into a deformed "meteor mutant". As history repeats itself and another bloodbath starts taking the lives of locals, a very meek Constable Adas gets caught in the middle of this madness and will soon find a fate weirder than death...
For a good hour or so, Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight 2 (2021) continues its affairs as a standardized backwoods kill-a-thon as it dish out murder after murder while trying to establish a set of characters to follow along in the story. Just as the first film, though, the characterization here can be a bit weird and random, if not downright annoying, such as our supposed lead here, Adas, being a whiny coward most of the time to the point he's just pathetic, or the fact two of of the folks who decided to help out the remaining police force happen to be a pair of Neo-Nazi hunters. It doesn't help that we will be, more or less, just be watching this group be dysfunctional for a while, but that's a little more tolerable looking into what this film have in store for us in the last act.
After practically murdering off almost everyone introduced so far, Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight 2 (2021) throws a curveball at us and we're suddenly looking into the monster's perspective as we learn why they're killing people, which sums up to them simply being evil. Just plain evil. One of the human characters is also turned into a meteor mutant and the final third of the movie is just now these two mutants frolicking around, teaching the other why it's great to be an evil murder creature and having monster sex. Yes. Monster sex. It's an odd turn of events, one that I wouldn't mind if it wasn't done around the remaining act which makes the whole thing feel rushed. The finale of it all also fails to be anything exciting as it kinda sizzle down and it all felt like it happened just for the sake of it happening and nothing else. (Like, what was even the point of it?)
Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight 2 (2021) shines the best when it's just the meteor mutant going ape on the dismemberments as the gore effects here are among the juiciest and the attacks are intense for their brutality. Whenever it tries to make something out of the cast, though, I think it would have been more welcoming if the film just stuck with the killer-in-the-woods jig and try not to over complicate things. Still, I'm not going to completely diss its shots at character development since a few scenes did come out rather hilarious, so I say that while it doesn't it completely deliver, it still has something for the fans of the gruesome and weird to clamor over!
Bodycount:
1 male had his legs torn off, bled to death
1 male pushed head first to a fusebox, disemboweled
1 male found slaughtered
1 male dies from exhaustion after his hands got cut off from a bear trap
1 male had his heart and larynx clawed out
1 female torn to pieces
1 male found beheaded
1 male gets knifed in the eye
1 female had her face flayed off and her head repeatedly stomped
1 female ran over by an armored truck
2 males decimated with a grenade
Total: 12
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