WARNING: THIS BLOG CONTAINS BODYCOUNT. HIGH RISK OF SPOILERS. ENTER IF YOU DARE.

Thursday, January 10, 2019

And Then There Were Six Lingerie: Lanetli Kadinlar (1990)

Boys and girls, it's that time again!
In today's episode, we have cleavage, skimpy night gowns and badly scratched photo quality packed in 69 minutes of eternity. I present to you...

Lanetli Kadinlar (Turkey, 1990) (AKA "Cursed Women", "Bloody Mansion Death")
Rating: *1/2
Starring: Nur Incegül, Hülya Konuk, Figen Aydogdu

Oh hey, a Turkish take on Agatha Christie's And Then There Were None! Only with badly acted women, very obvious budget restraints and cheese! Lots and lots of cheese! What could possibly go wrong? *insert internal screaming here*

A shot-on-video production of the lowest kind, Lanetli Kadinlar starts with six women getting a message one by one, inviting them to a remote island. Each of the gals have their own thing going before getting the invite; some were dancing, some were having a private lingerie photo session, but one of them appears to be having a bitter day as she looks at the camera with murder in her eyes while clenching a knife.

It isn't long before the girls make it to the island, with a grand mansion and a seventh lady expecting their arrival. Next thing we know we have fur coats being taken off, stringy and lacy undergarments are put on, and cat fights this way come as the girls come at each other after throwing a couple of insults. Things turn for the worse when the man who apparently invited them turns out dead at a park back at the city, a news that puts everybody on edge and growing a tad suspicious with one another.

Come the following morning (and a lesbian shower scene later), one of them is found stabbed in the back with a knife, indicating that a prowler (or, considering what plotting this movie is based on, one of girls) is out for blood. With no way out of the island, the remaining gals (still mostly wearing nothing else but skimpy baby dolls, mind you) must find a way to fend themselves against their killer who's finding no trouble snuffing them out via strangulation and poison.

To be frank, I never expected much from this film seeing this is made in Turkey around the early 90s. Turkish exploitation movies usually have that off-the-wall execution that's tries to look ambitious but ends up looking just insane, more often in the pretense that they're trying to better or at least equal popular mainstream movies. Kadinlar tries to be an exploitative murder mystery inspired by 70s Italian giallo, which honestly should work as the movie at least shows the basic structure of a mystery thriller, but the shoestring budget gravely affected everything this movie has to offer, may it be editing, acting, sound, picture quality, cinematography or, worst of all, direction.

The only thing I will remember Lenetli Kandilar for is the very fact that this is my first Turkish movie reviewed in this site. (at least, around the time this is written) Aside from that, this is nothing but pure garbage fire to keep the legions of hobos around my neighborhood warm for the night.

Bodycount:
1 male found dead
1 female knifed on the back
1 female poisoned
1 female garroted
1 female strangled with a tie
1 female shot on the gut
1 female knifed at the back
1 female shot
Total: 8

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