Pandemic Panics and Backwoods Bloodletting: Sick (2023)

Sick (2023)
Rating:****

Starring: Gideon Adlon, Bethlehem Million and Dylan Sprayberry

It all feels like it was just yesterday, ain't it? When year 2020, the beginning of a new decade, got ravaged by a modern plague, sending people into panic, hysteria and grief as COVID-19 struck down countless lives and affected our ways of living. It's a heavily topical subject, one that could either end up smart or infuriating in a horror film depending on how it's written into the plot. Fortunately for us, screenwriter Kevin Williamson penned this project and the result is mostly in par from what we could have expected from the guy who screenwrote slasher gems like Scream (1996) and I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997).

Opening at a big box store being picked clean by panic-buyers, health-conscious citizens and toilet paper hoarders, we see among them a young lad named Tyler (Joel Courtney) who finds himself on the receiving end of some creepy text messages and stalker-lite pictures originating from an unknown number. Tyler, understandably upset and creeped out, rushes out of there and drives all the way back to his apartment, unbeknownst to him that a figure clad in black have followed him and snuck their way in. After a real deal of brutalizing the lad, the intruder eventually puts an end to the boy by giving him the business end of a hunting knife.

Cut to morning some time after, we now follow college students Miri (Bethlehem Million) and Parker (Gideon Adlon) as they plan to "escape the plague" by isolating themselves at Parker's father's idyllic lakeside house. Though the two tackles the pandemic differently, with by-the-book Miri often doting on Parker's very laxed approach on social distancing and preventive measures, the gals very much agree that this retreat is what they needed to wait out the lockdowns, with life's simplest pleasures like a good warm tan, drinking games and edibles of both high and non-high kind readily available for them  to indulge in until this whole thing blows over. Parker's clueless on-again-off-again lover DJ (Dylan Sprayberry) soon joins in uninvited, an unwelcome surprise for both Parker and Miri but, seeing the dude's well-meaning enough with his presence, they allowed him to stay in and party along til' their heart's content.

As the trio have their good time for the night, they all fail to notice a familiar looking figure in black prowling around. Sneaking into the house. Hunting knife ready to strike... 

What we have here is a backwoods slasher flick's bonafide return to form, existing not to reinvent the subgenre but, rather, embraces its simplicity and make the best out of it by showcasing a small yet manageable and well-acted set of characters, a scenic backdrop that's ripe to be exploited for a good old fashioned cat-and-mouse and a real slick direction focusing on intensity and pacing. This means that, though Kevin Williamson's notably fun jabs at horror conventions are ever present within the script (along with exploited takes on pandemic etiquettes), it's played to a minimum here and with direction by John Hyams, who helmed the 2020 slasher-friendly creeper Alone, the story is mostly played as a straightforward horror thriller built upon bloody violence, relentless action and a decidedly plentiful stalk 'n stab scenes. Some plot contrivances still looms around the corner, such as the probability of a very human killer to easily stealth their way into a tiny apartment or the fact that at-home COVID testing kits are a thing here despite the story taking place months before those were released to the public, not to mention the attempted character drama which we have to sit through for a while before the good stuffs finally get going, but they're far from damning Sick (2023) unwatchable and one could even say they add some hokey charm to the movie.

Vitriolic cutting by editor Andrew Drazek also meshes well with Sick (2023)'s minimalist storyline, giving a lot of its horror and action sequences a stylized yet impactful take on thrills and scares. The kills are small in number, but are brutal enough to satisfy the inner gorehound and a good deal of them are even shot on long takes to keep its viciousness going. Perhaps the only thing that would divide the audience here is the motive behind the attacks; some will likely groan at the sheer hamminess of it, but for many of us who love the outlandishly cheesy murder motives of Golden Age slashers will value its unapologetic craziness and nods to one Friday the 13th (1980). 

White knuckled intensity and unrelenting slasher horror in its rawest, Sick (2023) is just an absolute blast from beginning to end, understanding what makes a backwoods horror tick in the right places and delivering on the genuine bloody mayhem. (and then some) So I say, don't sleep on this one! 

Bodycount:

1 male had his throat cut with a hunting knife

1 male ran through with a decorative curtain rod

1 male had his throat cut with a hunting knife

1 male beaten, knifed in the neck

1 male lands on deer antlers, impaled

1 female set ablaze

Total: 6