WARNING: THIS BLOG CONTAINS BODYCOUNT. HIGH RISK OF SPOILERS. ENTER IF YOU DARE.

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Well, It's A Barbecue Fork Actually, But Let's Just Call It...: The Hook of Woodland Heights (1990)

The Hook of Woodland Heights (1990 Short)
Rating: ***
Starring: Christine McNamara, Robert W. Allen and Michael Elyanow

Paired back-to-back in its release with an equally silly home-made slasher flick known as "Attack of the Killer Refrigerator", The Hook of Woodland Heights is an easy run through backwoods slasher clichés that seem to be inspired by a particular urban legend involving a sex-crazed couple and a sinister hook...

Young lovebirds Tommy and Katie drive to a cabin deep in the woods one day to bump uglies, all the while at a nearby mental asylum, one-handed loonie Mason escapes after crushing an orderly to death behind a door and slicing the another's head with a thrown clipboard. The killer then makes his way into stealing a barbecue fork from a vacationing family, kills their dog with it and permanently weaponizes himself by painfully sticking his new weapon into his right hand stump ala Chucky in Child's Play 2 (1990). Mason's little murder spree eventually leads him to Tommy and Katie's cabin, who both failed to hear the radio coverage of the psycho's escape as they're too busy makin' love. With trouble prowling nearby, will our two hapless lovers even get out of the woods alive?

The Hook of Woodland Heights
is a terrible movie, but a fun one in the cheesy sense of a gory B-flick! Running at a short 40 minute, the film's direction certainly has character, quick in its pacing, a fair count on the kills and a gory execution without being overly mean-spirited or relying on any big budget effects. Yes, there's bad acting, schlocky audio and questionable camera work, but compared to most do-it-yourself shlockiness, I am impressed with this one and I am glad to say that it's definitely a keeper! If you can find this title, whether as a cheap VHS copy double-billed with Attack of the Killer Refrigerator, or online through a generous host, find the time to relax and enjoy the fun time-waster that is The Hook of Woodland Heights!

Bodycount:
1 male crushed to death on a door
1 male had a thrown clipboard split his head
1 dog stabbed with a barbecue fork
1 boy stabbed to death with a barbecue fork
1 male disemboweled with a barbecue fork
1 male gets a barbecue fork to the groin
1 male shot on the head with a rifle
Total: 7

5 comments:

  1. Just tracked this one down after searching for it for ages!

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    1. And? your verdict my anonymous friend?

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    2. Haven't played it yet, but it's right on top of my "To Watch as Soon as I Get the Chance" pile.

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  2. Death by clipboard? LOL I think I have to see this :)

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    Replies
    1. you'll like it! it's short, quick and pleasing in the eyes funny!

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