WARNING: THIS BLOG CONTAINS BODYCOUNT. HIGH RISK OF SPOILERS. ENTER IF YOU DARE.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Not The Kind of Candy I want: Breadcrumbs (2011)

Breadcrumbs (2011)
rating: *1/2
starring: Kristina Klebe, Dan Shaked and Marianne Hagan


Fairy tale based slasher films. Needs to be done at some point.

While we do have cult masterpieces like Italy's Red Riding Hood (2003) or schlocks like Pinnochio's Revenge (a title that still got me laughing), Breadcrumbs tackles a hapless porn star and a film crew pitted against a homicidal brother of a girl they found seeking help. The problem is it's barely anything new as it's really just another backwoods slasher done a hundred times.

Agreeably, it's watchable for the movie's attempted sleaze by serving porn actors as victims. How are they different from dumb teenagers being killed off in the woods every day, though, is beyond me cuz, honestly, they don't look like porn actors and, interestingly, the porn sub-plot wasn't even all that focused.

Once the slasher part of the movie kicks in, this is where the film gets challgened; the kills are the simplest and quickest murders I've seen, and though it was kinda cool to see old fashioned murders done in that year when visceral mutilation and torment popularized by Torture Porn, a few elaborate or unique death sequences would had helped.

There's a twist in the end that was thrown in for the sake of a "wow" factor but it's hardly shocking. In fact, you can do the whole movie without the damn shock reveal because it's that too obvious and hardly even matters at that point.

An attempt to do it the old way, Breadcrumbs is just a sad, bleak and very ordinary slasher film that does very little for a change. Too bad, really, but at least the opening animation sequence looked great! (perhaps the only thing that got me watching in the first place)


bodycount:
1 female gutted
1 male falls into spiked pit
1 female presumably killed with razor
1 female had her neck slashed with razor
1 female pinned to the door with arrow
1 female gets shot arrows impaled through her
1 male axed on the back
1 male had his head bashed with rock, axed
1 male found wrapped in barbwires, left for dead
1 female presumably killed
total: 10

2 comments:

  1. Yeah, I just watched this one too - some interesting elements, but in the end they don't add up to much. Not an embarrassment - but meh. Hey - can you see if you can get ahold of a movie called Butchered? This is the 2010 version, not the older one from like 2003 or so. I'd like to know what you think of that one.

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  2. Hurm, never heard of that one, I'm currently looking at the IMDB entry and it looks like your everyday DTV. I'll probably check it out if I managed to get a copy.

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