WARNING: THIS BLOG CONTAINS BODYCOUNT. HIGH RISK OF SPOILERS. ENTER IF YOU DARE.

Sunday, June 22, 2014

101 Maniacs: Admin's Top Slashers 20-11

*As of 2014*

Inspired and tempted by this delicious countdown,  Here be my personal Top 101 Slasher movies that really stood out the most!

Note: These are in no particular order (save the last ten) and they're all personal picks, so, nope. Your faves or your orders does not matter here! Muahahaha!...ha!

30-21 Here

20. Identity (2003)
Eleven strangers got stuck in a motel during one stormy night, wherein they find themselves dwindling down in numbers. Sounds pretty generic? Don' be fooled, this movie got more twists and bloody turns to elevate this "thriller" into a pure slasher movie. 

Bloody Best Bits: One suspect was left alone and later found killed with a baseball bat in a display most shocking. 

19. Evilspeak
Carrie (any version) may have the "revenge of the teenager with powers" in the bag, but Evilspeak does a little better for me since it had the guts (and blood. and dismembered heads) to give us a much more gorily satisfying finale as one bullied chap got is sweet revenge on everybody that wronged him with the help of a black magic and a computer.

Bloody Best Bits: Again, the finale. Cheesiness aside, it's pretty badass and gloriously gory.

18. Scream (1996)
Wes Craven's bonafide 90s hit gets a warm welcome mat on this list for saving the sub-genre from obscurity and relaunching it for the mainstream audience. How? By giving us one wonderfully written whodunit about a small town terrorized by a ghost-faced killer, who may have something to do with a local girl who lost her mum a year prior ago.

Bloody Best Bits: The opening act. Seeing Drew Barrymore terrorized by a masked killer is devilish fun!

17. Freddy vs Jason
Dracula vs Frankenstein! King Kong vs Godzilla! Adam Sandler vs Ben Stiller! We all love monsters brawling it out, so seeing two slasher icons battle for blood and glory is a dream come true for us horror fans. Left powerless since the Elm street kids stopped believing in him, Freddy brought Jason back to life to spark paranoia under the Springwood Slasher's name. But when the masked hulk begins to murder more than what Freddy had hoped for, the two clashed for an epic showdown for slasher supremacy.

Bloody Best Bits: The fights. Both in the dream and the real world. Obviously.

16. Severance
A band of office co-workers from a weapon sales company meets grisly ends when mercenaries show up to make mince meat out of them. Chock full of laughs, gags and bloody mayhem, Anyone with smarts can find a chuckle-worthy time with this.

Bloody Best Bits: How hard is it for four people to remove a bear trap off their buddy's leg? Hard enough for them to mess it up and get said friend missing a limb. 

15. Inside/ A'Linterieur
On Christmas Eve, a lone pregnant photographer meets her worst nightmare on the form of a deranged woman breaking into her house to steal her baby straight out of her womb. What soon ensues is a body count, one mentally scarring film and a house with each room stained with blood.

Bloody Best Bits: There's this pretty grim scene where the villainess mercilessly murders a hooligan and then watches him death-rattle his way trying to hurt her. Of course, there's also the finale. (You cannot unsee it)

14. Urban Legend
An underrated 90s teen-kill, this fondue pot of slasher cliches passes with flying colors thanks to its creative streak of utilizing urban legends as the killer's MO, as the hooded maniac slashes their way through coeds in a murderous rampage.

Bloody Best Bits: I adore the opening murder, which is based on my favorite urban legend. Apart from that, there's also the pop-rock prank and one microwaved party animal.

13. The Burning (1981)
A vengeful groundskeeper returns to the old camp he used to work on to terrorize youngsters and counselors in a twisted sense of revenge. Accused of being a Friday the 13th rip-off, The Burning is a slow burn that does things right with brooding tension, a menacing killer and top-of-the-line gore effects courtesy of Tom Savini. 

Bloody Best Bits: The raft massacre.

12. Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
Taking place some years prior the events of the 2003 Texas Chainsaw Massacre reboot, we watch how Thomas Hewitt turn from a disturbed meat packer to a powertool-wielding cannibal juggernaut. I really don't understand the hate for this title; I find the story more interesting than the slasher-standard remake this title is supposed to follow, plus the kills are a lot juicier with the red stuff. 

Bloody Best Bits: Thomas gets revenge on his boss, and does a money shot with him and his first chainsaw.

11. New Nightmare
Perhaps the most unique entry to the Nightmare on Elm Street franchise, taking place in the "real world" where an evil entity takes the form of Freddy Kreuger and haunts Heather Langenkamp as he murders everybody dear to her.

Bloody Best Bit: The opening act involving a possessed movie prop in a murderous rampage. And then there's that one scene that kinda tugged a few strings for me: Heather's young son crying out to his imaginary dinosaur for help. Yeah, childhood fears, right there.

Next: The Honorable Mentions
dun-dun-duuuun!

7 comments:

  1. I forgot about 'Inside' - though it was so gruesome I think I know why I forgot it.
    Could never 'warm' to New Nightmare, despite it clearly being the most creative of its ilk.

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    1. for "Cheese-Eating Surrender Monkeys", the French sure loves to push their limits in Home Invasion movies. (nooffensetomyFrenchreaders!)

      Two-hour running time with Heather being terrorized by earthquakes and creepy callers is understandably not everyone's cake, my friend.

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  2. You may disagree with me, but I have a hard time calling some of your choices "Slashers", for example: F vs J, as well as all the Elm Street flicks. Eben though there are elements of the slasher formula, the Elm Street franchise isn't a slasher series. It's far too imagiantive for that.

    Also, Identity? Really?
    Evilspeak??? Come on, man!

    Nevertheless, great work on the lists so far.

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    1. For me, it's not the method or the choice of weapon that makes a slasher; it's the formula!

      If it features a killer (no matter what the species) that uses all the classic tropes of a slasher, or heavily borrows them to the point it's almost consuming, I'll consider whatever that movie is as a slasher.

      Identity is a stretch but it all dwells down into methodical killings with some scenes that's heavily influenced by slasher films such as the first murder where that starlet was killed.

      Evilspeak is also a long shot. In fact, if it wasn't for the bodycount, the inventive murders and that one-by-one sword picking in the end, I would have considered this more of a supernatural exploitation than a slasher-influenced b-fest.

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  3. I've heard it claimed Elm Street isn't a slasher series before... but there are no surefire rules. As long as there is a string of dead teenagers and a humanesque killer with a motivation and a weapon, I'd say that's all you need.

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  4. There's just not enough love for TCM: The Beginning, so thank you for giving it some! And New Nightmare is THE BEST of the whole series and my opinion about that will never change!

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    1. TCM: The Beginning will be loved! I swear it on my late grandmother's grave! >8u

      on a side note, glad you find New Nightmare enjoyable as well!

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