WARNING: THIS BLOG CONTAINS BODYCOUNT. HIGH RISK OF SPOILERS. ENTER IF YOU DARE.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Happy Turkey Day with a Short Shear Terror: Thanksgiving (2007)

Grindhouse: Thanksgiving (2007 short Faux Trailer)
rating: ***
starring: Mark Bakunas, Jeff Rendell and Karel Vanásek

While it's  feature length version is still a long shot away, for this Turkey Day, let's review one of the faux trailers featured in the retro-tastic double bill grindhouse tribute "Grindhouse".

As a tribute to slasher flicks of the 80s, Eli Roth directed his own Faux Trailer featuring the rampage of a Pilgrim-suited maniac, slaughtering people for Thanksgiving. He called it, well, Thanksgiving.

The trailer was simple as it is; small town holds an annual Thanksgiving celebration with parades and stuff, that is until we have our maniac doing what he does best. The trailer is really nothing more than money shots of what could be an actual 80s horror flick, with the sensibilities of the more recent slasher entries. And when I meant recent slasher entries, I meant it's over the top; we got a trampoline strip, public beheadings in a crowded parade, teens getting decapitated while making out (TWICE!) and our killer fucking a stuffed turkey.

If this was ever a rel flick released in the 80s, it'll probably banned like crazy with all them money shots, but as any wishful thinking any dreamer can dream, Roth made a cult legend out of this two minute fake trailer. I mean not only did the guy knows what makes a good 80s slasher fun (blood, sex, craziness and everything in combination) but he's probably the guy who notices how rarely Thanksgiving get tackled as a holiday killing spree. I mean, yes, we do have Home Sweet Home, but let's face it, that film hardly lived it like My Bloody Valentine did for Valentines Day. As far as I'm concerened, the closest thing we got as a real Thanksgiving slasher was Thankskilling, the story of an evil turkey on a rampage; now if Roth would only capture that same magic, or even improve it, I'm ready to see this.

Well, as I say, it maybe a while before Roth finishes this flick, but so far, let's savor this sweet taste of an impossible fruit, before the main course gets real. So til' then HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY!

Bodycount:
1 female killed with knife
1 male decapitated with axe
1 male killed offscreen
1 female lands groin first to a knife
1 male beheaded while in tryst
1 male beheaded
1 male found beheaded
total: 7

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